Maybe The Sign Makers Are Drunk...

Check out the 2 dudes to the right of the "Tribe, Beat Steinbrenner" sign. Ingenius!

Whatever Happened to the "John 3:16" Signs?

The Cleveland Indians played the New York Yankees last night in Game 1 of their divisional playoff series. Because the Indians had not been to the playoffs in about a decade, their home town fans were especially fervent. Below is a quick look at how a few poster-wielding fans expressed their joy at being back in the playoffs.

"Tribe, Beat Steinbrenner"
I don’t know when or why people started to use the name of the network broadcasting the game (in this case, TBS) as a pro-home-team acronym, and to be honest, I don't really care. But I do think it’s really lazy and a cheap way to try to get on TV. But I have always dreamed of going to a Sunday night baseball game with this poster:
Everybody
Suck my
Penis
Now!!!
Juvenile, yes, but awesomely so.

"Hey LeBron – WITNESS This Championship!"
Lame for the following reasons:
a. You’re calling out a dude who plays a different sport
b. You reference the slogan of a commercial. This is a popular thing to do. People think it's clever. It is not.
c. The series during which you hold up this sign doesn’t determine a champion of anything

"Hey Wang – Wong Number!!!"
Wow. I just don't... Wow. This poster is aimed at Yankees starting pitcher Chien-Ming Wang, who is from Taiwan. I'm sure the douche bag who made this sign knew that "Wong" is the Cantonese romanization of the surname "Wang," and that he cleverly used this knowledge to subtly taunt the Yankees best pitcher, inflaming a generations-old sensitivity.

Either that, or the sign was made by Danny DeVito.

"Not In Our Tepee [sic]"
Okay, you're the Cleveland Indians. Persons indigenous to the Americas are referred to as Indians. Indians lived in conical tents made of animal skin. I get it. But it's fucking spelled "teepee" (or "tipi"), you shitdick. Jesus, if grammatical and syntactically correctness can't be found in the fan-made signs at a baseball game, then we've already lost...

Stuff you can't make up...

From the Associated Press:

Blind people say hybrid cars pose safety risk:
Visually impaired can't hear gas-electric vehicles at slow speeds

Pete Vs. Pat: The Makings of a Conversation**

Pete, engaged in a phone call, walks up to Pat

Pete (on phone): ...I don't care if you didn't hear me the first time! I said it once and now it's lost in forever. That's all I have to say about the subject. Good day! [hangs up]
(to Pat): What are you looking at douche bag?

Pat: Why are you always so hostile?

Pete: It's what I'm paid to do! I need confrontation to keep me alive! What the hell do you do for a living, video tape FDA meetings, legal depositions, and interpretative dance - Glen Burnie style?

Pat: Watch your step, buddy.

Pete: I bet lawyers and doctors are incredibly fun to listen to, huh? What's that like? And approximately how many dance numbers have you seen performed to "We're All In This Together" from High School Musical?

Pat: It's like getting verbal lobotomies and more than 20, respectively. Man, that sure is some thin ice you're trampling on...

Pete: And, oh yeah, what are you studying again? Some form of so-called social science? Ha! Do they even pay people to do that shit? Social scientists are even less trustworthy than real scientists!

Pat: Nothing is an exact science. Now please, let go of my feelings.

Pete: You're wasting my valuable time, butt crust. The real reason I came here was to give you this...

Pat: Craig Biggio's rookie baseball card?

Pete: It's to remind you how horribly, horribly old you have to be to have independent knowledge of the beginning and ending of some dude's 20 year baseball career. And to remind you what a giant nerd you are because you probably already have this stashed away somewhere, don't you?

Pat: You're a magnificent bastard.

Pete: And every day is payday. Lates!

both leave



**This one scene play was brought to you by HYPE. Turn your idea or product into a steaming pile of it!