What Are We Gonna Do With All This Trash?: Something Happened on the TV Recently

September 14, 2009

Something Happened on the TV Recently

Look, I don't know what the hell an 'MTV' or a 'VMA' is, and I'm not sure about Taylor's swiftness, but can KanyefuckingWest seriously go 5 minutes without hawking such a wide array of asshattery?

Mike, weren't you just talking about godliness being next to dickishness? I think dude fits the bill.

3 comments:

Mike said...: Kayne West is fucking insane -- and he hasn't made a good song in like four or five years. He had to be out-of-his-mind high. Otherwise, this just makes no sense. You storm the stage and act like petulant child because fucking Beyonce didn't win Best Female Video? Seriously, what's fucking wrong with that dude. That's where he takes a stand? George W. Bush hates black people! And Beyonce's getting raped by the VMAs!

If he's at all smart (and I don't think he is), Team Kanye will announce soon that he's entering rehad, "for exahaustion."; 1:02 PM
Scrap Heap Pete said...: "...and he hasn't made a good song in like four or five years."

Thank you for saying this--it's hard for me to tell because I've always thought he's been pretty overrated as an emcee; I wasn't a huge fan before he blew up, either.

But after the Eminem teabagging incident and shows like the Hills, Next, and the Real World, do I really think that anything MTV broadcasts is not staged?; 3:38 PM
Mike said...: I should have been more clear: I'd rather listen to an improvised battle rap between Puffy and Robin Williams doing his black voice than to hear Kanye on the mic. But Mr. West was a very fine producer at one point. Even that record that had "Golddigger" on it, which Jon Brion co-produced, had some great moments on it, none of which involved Kanye rapping/talking. And the last good song he made, "Gone," is awesome when Cam'ron is rapping, and is shit-in-your-mouth bad when 'Ye is up to bat.

Anyway, I don't really think it was staged. I don't care either way, but it's hard to imagine West's people approaching Taylor Swift's people and going, "Okay, this'll be great. Kanye wants to storm the stage and act like a four-year-old, mmmkay?" I think of Kanye as more of a spur-of-the-moment type asshole.

It's amazing that such a small bag can hold so much douche.; 4:10 PM

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A History Of Trash

Trash, at first, was a pretty cool guy. You know, he’d come over with some beers, and you’d hang out and have a couple of laughs. Maybe Trash brought some weed with him, and you guys tried to sync up Dark Side Of The Moon with The Wizard Of Oz until you remembered you lost your VHS copy of that movie sometime in college and that you fucking hate Pink Floyd. Good times were had, nonetheless.

But then, you don’t know what changed, but Trash started to overstay his welcome. He’d just linger for hours, never taking the hint you wanted him to leave, no matter how many times you yawned obnoxiously or mentioned how early you had to get up tomorrow. Trash just didn’t get it. You were getting older. You didn’t have the time anymore to stay up until 3 a.m. to talk about the Port season of “The Wire” or how much you miss Jawbox. Eventually, you just stopped taking Trash’s phone calls and no longer replied to his group e-mails about sneaking into abandoned mental hospitals.

Last time you saw Trash, he was smoking alone outside a local dive bar, looking down at his decaying and mismatched shoes. You hoped he had been doing well. You hoped he had not been hurt by the disintegration of your friendship. And if he had, you wanted to comfort him. You wanted to tell him that even though people move on with their lives, it doesn’t mean they stop caring. You wanted him to see in your eyes a sincere appreciation for the time you shared, because all the relationships in our lives help make us who we are, and even if you weren’t the best of friends anymore, you wanted him to know that there would always be a piece of Trash in your heart.

But instead, you looked away and crossed the street. You were with your new girlfriend, and you really didn’t want to have to explain Trash to her. She’d never understand.