Happy St. Patrick's Day! {burp!}

Long before Irish-Americans were able to carve out their own little slice of white privilege in the U.S., the Irish were largely considered to be hyper-sexual, criminal apes incapable of exhibiting any type of impulse control, strong work ethic, or money management (hmm, these stereotypes sure sound familiar) when compared to the more "mainstream" European immigrants who came to America. But boy, the Irish have written the shit out of some books!

So in honor of St. Patrick's Day and Irish word-smithing, I present this short list of some terms that are made more or less awesome by putting the word "Irish" at the beginning:

Irish curtains = spiderwebs, cobwebs (personal aside: my old boss Rich refers to his dust-bunnies and cobwebs as Irish curtains)

Irish hint = a threat

Irish ambulance/chariot = a wheelbarrow

Irish dividend = breaking even

Irish coat of arms = a black eye and a bloody nose

Irish confetti = rocks and stones

Irish promotion = a demotion

Irish clubhouse = prison

Irish cocktail = a spiked drink

Irish parliament = a large group of people where everyone is talking, and no one is listening (note: I'm not sure this isn't true of all parliament/government anymore, regardless of ethnic qualifier.)

Irish goodbye = a farewell that dispenses with all of the usual social conventions surrounding 'saying goodbye'--formal pleasantries such as handshakes, eye contact, 'hey, see you later', things of this nature.

This last one is my personal favorite--and I think we all have had some experience with what is being described here. This phenomenon probably stems from the heroic desire to avoid any social awkwardness associated with real life stuff (death, family, poverty, saying goodnight/goodbye, etc)

On that note, I think I'll be sneakily inching toward the side door..


Sláinte!